#and that's with me leaving out a ton of stuff so this post doesn't get too bloated...

[thatonegayship]

I had to

Wait, does the cheating thing on the bond always works? bcs that would be kinda freaky for R!Dipper like imagine you get pinned down by someone in the corner of a br or smthng and then said person kissed you and proceeded to explode into red mist and you literally have no idea what happened.

Also, would the constellation mark be a "cursed" Mark over the years, like you would give birth to a baby and the doctor says "😟 I am so sorry ma'am,,, I'm afraid your baby has the Cipher Companion mark. ( could also be something equally as science-y like Ursa Major, Constellation Calamation, etc idk)" And you just burst into tears.

Would that mean that dipper would get into a special program(demon wrangling program or smthng, demonologist? Maybe)? Or would the parents hide it away hoping that Bill would never take their child away?

(Sorry this au is just very interesting to me,,,, I hope u get more motivation, keep writing author 💪)

These are all options! The fun part of reincarnation AU being left ambiguous is that technically any of them could happen.

[legandairy-horror]

Does anyone else feel a strange sort of dread waiting for new deltarune chapters?

It sounds crazy right? I admit it's a weird feeling for sure, and I'm not even 100% sure if dread is the right way to describe it. But as more info is revealed and the next chapter inevitably gets closer and closer to releasing I can't help but feel a strange sort of, melancholy? Longing? The only way I can describe it is "when you know the goodbye is coming". The strange somber feeling when you know you’re going to have to leave stuff behind, but aren't quite ready for it yet.

warning: words. Homestuck

In 3 months Chapter 1 will be 6 years old, and in 2 months Chapter 2 will be 3 years old. Deltarune is ostensibly in Early Access but this release schedule puts new chapters closer in time scale to whole sequals if anything, which they most assuredly are not trying to be. This has created a strange situation in the fanbase that I don't think I've ever truly seen anywhere else. One where, In the time between chapters It feels like everyone has had their own chance to decide what Deltarune is to them. To create their own version of this story, to write their own themes that they want to see explored, to imagine their own events and plot twists they want to see play out.

@lynxgriffin Paper Trail Comic Being an Alternate Story following off of chapter 1

@lilybug-02 The Chara Timeline Being one of many interpretations on the popular Asriel & Chara roommates headcannon.

@huecycles Andromeda Chapters being their interpretation on the full game

The innumerable Deltarune Theorists and analysts like HalfBreadChaos, Andrew Cunningham, Stuffed Alpaca, etc. etc.

@vyletbunni Deltatraveler being a whole ass fangame based around a chapter 2 meme that it has long since outlived

And that's kinda the thing isn't it? Once more deltarune comes out, a ton of these projects will just become outdated, it's an inevitability. So what will happen to them? will they become forgotten? maybe, maybe not, it's impossible to tell. but either way it feels kinda sad to think about yknow? that one day all the time and effort spent and all the memories made might one day just cease to exist.

There's a lot more I could say on this topic if given the chance but to keep this tumblr post from morphing into a 2 hour long video essay in text form let me leave off with this.

In the age of the internet and social media there will always be a fan of something. Nothing truly dies quite like it used to anymore, regardless of whatever influencers want you to believe. But that doesn't mean things stop changing, that there wasn't a past that has since been left behind. I'm a Homestuck fan. more specifically I'm a Late Homestuck fan, one who came in after the comic had already ended and it's peak in popularity was long behind it. The fandom's still around all these years later. But it'd be foolish to admit that, 8 years after the comics controversial end, the inescapable trend of new fans replacing old fans has left the fandom wholly disconnected from the monolith that it once was. the only remnants of which lie in decades old discourse and fanfiction. Like old relics of a long forgotten city, waiting to be excavated under a fine layer of dirt.

Before I close out here I just want to make it clear: I'm not saying that we should be trying to return to some nebulous "glorious past" that never really existed. I'm not trying to deride Toby Fox for not working in the sweatshop hard enough to produce more content™, or whatever you wanna try and spin-doctor this post into. It's just a thought that creeps into my head every now that I wanted to share, see if anyone feels the same, yknow?

Besides it's not all doom and gloom. For those of you OG Homestucks who read till the end. You remember Heinoustuck? Guidestuck? Nightfall? Fucking Ke$haStuck? yeah those are still going by the way! after years of inactivity they've now started back up again. some under new authors and some by the same author but still!

You could say a lot about that but to me at least, it makes me feels hopeful in a way. That, even if not everything will survive. we'll at least have some mementos to remember what came before.

[creativitysloyalservant]

i have decided to break my lack of original posting on this blog to bring you my Thoughts on Rot in Paradise. because i played it as soon as i got up this morning and i have scoured for some opinions after finishing it, and now i have my own!!

(and also i posted this on twitter but twitter has such a Shit wordcount that i'm also posting my things here with More Detail)

so! spoilers under the cut, please go and play the game if you haven't. it takes literally an hour (it only took nearly 2 hours for me because i like voice acting by myself and exploring every nook and cranny) and it's also free. so maybe come back into the tag once you're done.

okay, so i noticed quite a number of people being confused and disappointed on the lack of an explanation for the monster. it's brought up in the story as the central thing driving the plot, but it's never explained on what "she" is, why she's compelling people to eat a ton of fish-related food or hell, metal, and why this doesn't impact June at all.

but you know what I think?

i think that that's the point. the focus of rot in paradise isn't supposed to be on the monster.

yeah, it's the thing that pushes the plot along besides June and the gang going on vacation in this island. it's what's causing that uneasiness from the moment that guy grabs June's arm at the drinks, to the sheer unnerving feeling of witnessing people going to the ocean to get Raptured basically. i know i personally felt a chill when i saw that one dude literally eating chains and the other hauling an anchor, as if they're trying to make themselves heavier so they get taken by whatever She is.

but that's not the main point! the main conflict is about June and her friends.

as people have pointed out, this game is about toxic friendships and relationships! it's foreshadowed in the conversation that June has with the gang about her cousin (which i will also get into), and it carries it through the way her friends are horribly warped by this ocean Creature. June goes on a silly little vacation trip with her friends only for them to become so so different from themselves that they lash out at her and even hit her in McCoy's case.

but she still sticks it out with them. through the whole game, even despite their verbal abuse, despite being slapped, despite them being people that she can hardly recognise. she stays with them for the whole game, up until the point where you are given the two options at the very end. and she could still stay with them.

because they're still her friends. she cares about them even if they still hurt her. from the way June still tells Carmen to tell June if she needs anything after Carmen literally tells her to shut up and leave, the way June worries about Vonnie eating seafood even though she continues to stuff herself despite being implied to either hate or make an active choice to not eat seafood, to the way June still trudges out to sea screaming for McCoy to come back to the shore as he wades further in even after he slapped her until her nose bled.

it mirrors the conversation about her cousin, the reason for why June was looking forward to the vacation. that while she did comfort her cousin through all of it, June clearly says that "they were dickheads, and she should have ditched them a long time ago".

but it's funny, isn't it? that June, an outsider to her cousin's friend group, easily sees the pain that her cousin's friends are causing her, and immediately calls it as it is. that her cousin should have left the second they hurt her.

and yet now, when her friends hurt her, even though this was a quick and sudden change that happened in a span of three days, June still sticks around. her friends are dickheads right now, and we can see that in the way they interact with June, but she still stays.

because they're her friends. and how could she just leave them like this if it's something that's causing them to be this way?

so no, i don't think the monster is supposed to be the main picture. we don't need to know what it looks like, or why it needs to do this to the islanders, or how it's even doing it in the first place. it adds to the scariness of the game, as per the Spooktober Game Jam, sure, but that's not the point. might be a bit disappointing to some, but that's not the point.

the point is about June, and the choice that she needs to make at the end of the game.

it's a choice on whether she chooses to be pulled deeper into the tides and be with the friends who hurt her and will continue to hurt her in this way,

or to leave them to their fates, whether deserved or not, and resurface to a world where she's alone without her friends.

and even though the first choice hurts much more in the long run, doesn't the second hurt even more in the moment? knowing that you're alone at the end of all of this?

even if it is the right choice, i'm sure the pain must be unbearable in the moment.

[candlewaxandp0lar0ids]

How to Leave Comments on Fanfiction

So, I recently made a poll to know if people might find it helpful to have a list of things they could talk about when leaving comments on fanfictions, be it on Ao3 or on here. A majority of people were interested in seeing the post so, well, I'm making it. I started writing and posting stuff online when I was a teenager, on a website where leaving constructive criticism was the norm. It's by far the place where I've gotten the most feedback and it was an incredibly formative experience for me as a young writer — and it taught me how to leave detailed comments.

Writing comments doesn't necessarily come easy. It's something that you may need to learn how to do, but the good news is that you can learn how to do it, so don't worry if you don't know what to say at first. Hopefully this list will give you some pointers on how to do that.

This is more or less the list I go through when I want to leave a detailed comment. Even if I don't have a specific idea at first, I'll go through the steps and I never come out empty-handed.

Comment etiquette:

What became apparent with the poll I made was that a lot of people worry about how they'll be perceived by the writers if they leave a comment. Now, obviously, writers aren't a monolith, but 99% of the time writers will be thrilled that you took the time to leave a comment to let them know what you enjoyed in their fic. I cannot stress this enough. We're not going to judge someone based on a positive comment they leave.

As it stands, on Tumblr and Ao3, it's seen as rude to leave negative feedback, unless the author has explicitly asked for it/agreed to it, so that's what I'll be going over here. Since quite a few writers did say on that post that they would like to get constructive comments as well, stay tuned, I'm trying to get something together to do that for authors. Other than that, you're good to go.

The main ways to let an author know your thoughts on a fic on Tumblr are:

reblogging a fic with your thoughts underneath it

reblogging with your thoughts in the tags, which is often less formal

leaving a comment as a 'reaction'

sending in an ask if they're activated on the blog (which means you can stay anonymous, if anon asks are allowed)

Reblogging means that your followers will see the post as well, and is therefore really appreciated on Tumblr.

As a note, you may find different systems work for different fics! Maybe leaving tag rambles works for you when commenting on drabbles, for example for me it's the system I use to leave comments on smut.

General advice:

Everything I'm saying in here is for people who want to be able to leave longer/more detailed comments and don't always know where to start. If, for whatever reason, you're not comfortable or you don't have time to do it at the moment, a simple "I love the fic, thank you for writing it" always goes a long way for an author.

The key thing to keep in mind if you're trying to find something else to say, I think, is to try making the comment specific to the fic you're leaving it on. It shows the writer what you took away from the fic and the fic's strong points, which is both meaningful and helpful to an author.

Comments don't have to be long to be meaningful. Don't stress about writing a ton; a one-sentence comment highlighting the fic's humor or how emotional it made you can be incredibly impactful.

With this out of the way, I'll go through things you can talk about in a comment, starting with what I think is the easiest and moving on to things that could require more thought. You don't have to do all of that. You may never use some of the things on that list. Leaving comments should not be a source of anxiety. So take what you want from the list, maybe come back to it if you need more inspiration, and don't worry too much about it :)

Favorite line(s) : pull from the fic to let the author know what your favorite line was. If you wish, you can expand on that by saying why it was your favorite: did it make you laugh? Did it make you feel something specific? Did the author nail the characterization with it? Was there some incredible metaphor? Did you find it beautiful or poetic even if you can't go into detail? Is there one line in particular at the beginning of the fic that hooked you in and made you want to keep reading?

All of that is very valuable for a writer to know. Some of my favorite comments I've gotten were a list of a reader's favorite lines from a fic with one or two sentences to explain why they liked them, so don't hesitate to do that more than once if you can!

Emotions:  if there’s one thing I know about writers, it’s that we’re thrilled when we’ve made you cry. So tell us: how did the writing make you feel? Did you laugh out loud? If you did, was it the dialogue, or the narrator? Did it make you cry? Which part? Could you relate to one of the characters? Did it make you feel seen? Did the fluff make you feel all fuzzy inside or did the angst twist knots in your stomach? This isn't an exhaustive list, and emotions are great to draw from when you're leaving a comment!

Favorite element of the writing: Is there one thing in the writing that struck you as being particularly good, or what was your favorite thing to read? Is the author a master at writing dialogue? Are their descriptions so good you could see the whole scene? Are they really good at getting in a character's head and describing their emotions? Were you hooked from the start and couldn't stop until you reached the end?

Characterization: Now, this might be less instinctive, but if you've been in a fandom for a while, you'll probably be able to identify these things fairly easily. You can tell the author if you think they've nailed one aspect of a character. Did you have a favorite character in the fic? What did you think of them? Did the author manage to capture their voice? Was the attitude spot-on? Which parts of the character, if you can name them? Were there aspects of the character you particularly enjoyed? Did the author shine a light on something you hadn't considered or on something you don't think is highlighted often enough? Is there one thing from the fic you can actually picture/hear a character doing/saying in your head?

Style: I'd argue this is the hardest part, and you shouldn't feel bad if it's not something you can really comment on. As someone whose first language isn't English, I know I struggle with it. Style can be perceived as the way the author's voice comes through in the text. It can come through in punctuation, in the way sentences are formed, in the choice of the words themselves. If, when you read, you feel something intangible that doesn't fit well in the other categories, it just might be the author's style.

Here are some things (non-exhaustive list, of course) you could say about an author's style: it can be direct, straight to the point. The author doesn't bother with ornaments. Every sentence feels impactful. Maybe the writing feels intense. You're overwhelmed by the characters and their feelings and you feel truly engulfed in the story. Maybe the style is light and airy. It's so easy to read you don't even notice you are reading. Maybe the writing is intricate. Going through it is like piecing a puzzle together, sentences are foreshadowing and metaphors reveal deep truths about the characters. Maybe the style is rich. While not always the easiest, it's a pleasure to read through it, the author has a wide vocabulary, and you might want to compare it to a well-written novel.

If you identify specific elements of that style (metaphors, interesting use of punctuation, etc.), don't hesitate to point them out and let the author know you enjoy them!

That is it for this post, hopefully it doesn't look too daunting — again, you absolutely do not need to do all that in any comment, but maybe going through this list can help you leave comments for authors you enjoy.

I like to end my comments with 'Thank you for writing and sharing this with us', so I'll tell you thank you for reading, I hope this was helpful, and please consider reblogging if you'd like to save this or if you think it could help someone else!

As a bonus, my friend @elidebrey and I (but mostly her) made a 'checklist' for commenting, to help remember all this if that's something you'd like, so use at will!

A big thank you to @elidebrey, @yoongihan and @antoniorhinothethird for their precious opinions on this ♥

[thestrangestthlng]

Thoughts and prayers rants...

So, now that I've had almost 48 hours to marinate on this and cycled through my emotions, I am in a much better headspace to talk on the whole 9-1-1 of it all.

But this bears repeating: We fell in love with Tommy because he made Buck fall in love with Evan.

So, first and foremost, I've decided that canon stopped for me at 8x05. lol. I am going to continue with my BT train like that shit show didn't happen. And for me, for a while, I am going to let the show end there. I will go back, probably after the hiatus, but not how I was. I do love all the characters on this show (some more than others) and I still want to be able to see their journey, but I need a break from that manipulation stunt. I'm still going to share all the positive BT stuff I see and all the beautiful Lou content I see.

Secondly, now that I am over the initial hurt of the breakup, I'm just mad. We were manipulated intentionally with 8x05 for us to feel worse when the break up happened. That was unnecessary. And that was cruel. And I know that a lot of this is because it was the icing on a shit week. Emotions were already raw due to the election and it was reallllllyyyy bad timing for this, but that doesn't make the way they did it okay, just that it can explain why there was such a strong reaction for many of us, on top of the completely justified anger.

Breakups happen, and that's okay. If it was the end of Tommy's time on the show, that's okay. I am a Buck girlie and I always will be. But... the breakup was reductive, stereotypical, and just poor storytelling. I get they want to leave doors open a crack, because you never truly know, but turning him into an OOC stereotypical biphobic gay man is disgusting. You had this beautiful thing and you shat on it. I am going to do another post about my personal relationship with groundbreaking storylines next.

That was a miscommunication. That was a breakup where someone chases after you and is like wtf actually just happened. It felt like whiplash, because that is not how breakups are formulated in media. You know how else you could have written him out of the story?

At the date (and the basketball tickets are actually a really sweet touch when you think about it) Tommy could have told Buck that he got a job offer in another city or state or that his parents are ill and he has to go home to take care of them and asked Buck to go with him. At the apartment, it could have been buck telling him that as much as he could see a future with him, he can't go with him.

Would it have sucked? Yes. But it wouldn't have induced this amount of rage.

For over six months Lou and BTs have been at the receiving amount of a ton of vitriol. And that's not to say that there weren't antagonizers on this side of the fence or that BTs never did anything wrong, but this isn't a both sides bullshit piece. People can suck everywhere, but only one "side" harassed an actor and his family with death threats, he read about the "stoning" calls, used slurs on a regular basis. All of this persisted for months for it to turn out that he was the only one who seemed to give a shit about the story and it's representation. There honestly doesn't seem like there would have been anyone better for it.

You know what's ironic? It was the Buddie's hate and vitriol that pulled me into fandom and made me love Tommy and then Lou. When they would run their mouths, I would look into it and I found a man who genuinely seems like (he is still someone we don't know) a wonderfully kind, sweethearted, genuine man. He looks like a bundle of light and his smile can warm even the coldest hearts. So their vitriol made me a fan. So thanks BoBs.

Buck and Tommy wasn't just about Buck's queerness and definitely not about "wanting to see two white men kiss". It was about our love for Buck. We saw him happier and more fulfilled than he's ever been. We see his life being lived and full of love and stuff and joy.

Again:

We fell in love with Tommy because he made Buck fall in love with Evan.

And you know what, not matter how reductive and all the phobics that breakup was, they can never take that away from us.

[invidiia]

❐ - yandere!dazai and yandere!chuuya comforting the reader on their period

notes ; headcanons for anyone else who on their period rn </3 the worst thing ever tbh.. this is kinda self indulgent

prompt ; dazai and chuuya's (separate) darling gets their period and they comfort them

warnings ; yandere themes, blood, kidnapped!reader, drugging, ada!dazai, soft!yan chuuya and dazai, mentions of sex but no actual doing it, mention of stalking, afab reader, toxic relationships

masterlist - rules - last post

dazai ::

it's not like you can hide your period from dazai, especially if he kidnapped you.

dazai doesn't know a ton about periods - sure, he knows that they existed, but he didn't think the situation through when he first kidnapped you. he didn't buy pads or anything in advance when he first decided to take you for himself, so when he woke up to see blood on the sheets under you, dazai was a tiny bit surprised.

but not entirely - he should have known the time of your month would roll around soon enough. dazai wasn't mad or upset at all.

"ah.. belladonna, why didn't you tell me about this? no, i'm not mad at you! i think this means no sex for.. how long?! i don't think i'll surviivee~!"

just ignore his wailing and you'll probably be fine

dazai's not actually upset, he really does wanna help you. he'll wrap you in a blanket while he goes to leave for the store, poking your cheek and smiling a little too softly while he tells you to be good while he's gone

he doesn't have bad intentions or anything, he's just being overly nice to you because he just feels like it

he comes back from the store with whatever you neeed, he probably asked a female member of the agency or a worker or someone else who knew what to get for you, because there is absolutely no way in hell he actually knows what to buy

but he definitely came back with a few things that you liked!! no point in asking how he knew you liked the stuff, because he'll just say he stalked you, and that might just make you more uncomfortable. best not to question him!!

he sees your cramp pain as an excuse to hold and touch you more. he doesn't care that you're bleeding the entire time, dazai just likes that he can hold you!

of course, he realizes that cuddles don't stop the cramping - he just thinks it'll help a lot more. dazai get's super touchy and clingy because he knows that you're less likely to resist. even if you do, he doesn't mind unless you insult him, because then he'll just lock you in the bathroom with water and some of the snacks he bought you to give you some 'alone time.' after about an hour or two, he's sure you'll come back into his arms!! <3

oh, belladonna, i thought you didn't want to cuddle, and now you're holding onto me..? no matter, i'm glad you've finally came around.. is there anything you want?

chuuya ::

chuuya also knows about periods and what they are, but he knows a little bit more about them than dazai, because he's just him yk?? he's that dude (other than jay from the kubz scouts)

when he first woke up to you next to him with blood under you, he thought you were hurt or something, but then when he woke you up, you had to explain to him that you just got your period and that you were fine.

by your argument, chuuya made a big deal out of it, but by chuuya's, he was just helping you feel better.

"darling, stop movin', i'm just trying to make you feel better.. what? yeah.. yeah, i'll get whatever you want, okay?"

if you yell at him, he'll just give you space. of course he'll still get you what you want, he'll just be.. less doting.

he'll even go as far to ignore you. so while you're wailing in pain from your cramps, chuuya's sitting down comfortably on the couch, reading and paying no attention to your little sobs from the pain of your cramps. it's really just a toxic thing - he doesn't wanna see you in such pain, he really doesn't. but why should he be so kind to you if you don't want to be nice?

i can imagine an argument breaking out between you two, because he can't ignore you forever. if you decide to yell at him again, then he'll just yell back.

chuuya might even just drug you to shut you up, offering you tea or medicine to help you feel better. but five minutes later, you're out like a light while he picks up your body to wrap you up back in blankets.

you'll probably wake up with arms wrapped around your waist with his knee inbetween your thighs. chances are, you're still affected by the drug and too tired to move or push him off. he understands that cuddling doesn't fully stop the cramp pain, but he doesn't care, because all chuuya wants to do is help you.

"don't move.. it's okay. just go back to sleep. i love you, okay?"

[homey-worshiper]

things you can do for lady hestia

{ to fight consumerism }

use this old notebook - i think there is something really special about buying new stuff for your deities, of course, but i also think that using things you already have is more important, let's not waste trees, our deities wouldn't want that, if you already have an empty or half empty notebook - i say dedicate it to your deity, for me lady hestia, i also feel like she prefers older, dusty & rusty things instead of new and shiny

look through your pens, markers and find a colour that resonates with her, usually she is depicted covered in orange, red, yellow, lilac clothes, but maybe you feel like she would love this one specific brown pen. it can be coloured cover or filling, whatever you have or feel more connected to. and simply write with it. and i don't mean only in your notebooks, book of shadows - everywhere you can, you read a book and think "i think lady hestia would love to hear my thoughts about this scene" write it

drawings, doodles - of course you can draw her symbols, flames, maybe even how you would imagine her (or see her), but i am also just thinking of doodling as an act of relaxing, maybe you are listening to a boring lecture and start drawing in your book, and that also means draw everywhere, what i love to do is making a to-do list and that making doodles around it - a cozy bed, breakfast i want to make, a candle i will light while doing chores

have a pinterest boards for her - i don't think i will ever shut up about it, pinterest boards as digital altars {i want to make a bigger post on it so i will leave it at that for now}

prayer beads - look around your old jewellery, maybe you have an old bracelet, and old necklace, if it's beaded here you go - a prayer beads. tho maybe you are a jewellery collector like me and have a ton of pieces that could be perfect and then maybe you also feel confident in cutting those pieces and making a whole new necklace/bracelet from them. just remember it doesn't need to be perfect, as long as you will have a special connection to it, lady hestia will find it special

you don't need to buy new candles. i know if that when you see a specific colour or scent associated with a deity you want to get this specific one for them, but i want to you to look around the candles you already have. lady hestia loves candles, no matter which one i light up i feel her presence, but for you it may be not enough, then - carve her name, symbol with a needle, use an oil associated with her, maybe put a sticker on the jar (not on the wax itself i beg), put it on her altar or just talk to her and simply tell her "so my lady this is going to be your candle, hope you like it" and trust me she will

read books with her, or for her. it doesn't need to be paper form, it can be on you kindle or on you phone. before reading invite her to read with you or if you have an altar, sit near it and start reading (as always you can talk out loud, you can whisper, or talk in your head)

[faiell]

yapping about fics and commenting

sorry to yap but work is boring today and tumblr isn't blocked on my work computer LOL

ok it's abt that post where the writer friend stopped writing because they weren't getting the comments/kudos they wanted.

i'm like. an overeager fandom person. like i cannot get into a fandom without wanting to meet new people and make friends. i love yapping about whatever silly gay idiots i'm hyperfixating over. i'm all about community, and sharing the joy of fandom, and all that fun positive stuff.

i don't post my art for stats but like. that means nothing coming from me tbh. i get stats. i can't accurately predict what would happen if i stopped getting notes on my art, but i would probably keep drawing and keep posting, just maybe less confidently, and less often. i recognize that stats make it much easier and while it’s not my primary motivation, it definitely motivates me to keep posting.

and yet. for years, i never commented on fic. i think i left kudos? and i saw posts like this all the time about how writers were so sad they didn't get comments. and i would feel super guilty about it all the time. but i still wouldn't do it! it sounds stupid, but i would feel pressured. if i liked a fic a lot, it felt even more difficult to comment, because i thought i would have to somehow give back to the author everything that fic gave to me. i wanted to craft the perfect comment that could perfectly encapsulate everything a fic made me feel. and that was way too much pressure so i would just not say anything.

when i got into drarry, i started reading a shit ton of fic. and i still wouldn't comment. i left maybe... 2 or 3 comments, maybe, i think. i can't remember. but i had a lot to say and i WANTED the writers to hear that i had read it and liked it. i just... didn't comment! u know what i did instead? i just fucking straight up DM'd writers on discord and started gushing to them that i liked their fic. somehow i was confident enough to do that, but writing a comment still felt like too much pressure. ?? i don't understand it either, but in my head it felt like a writing assignment, but when I was in DMs it felt more like a conversation and so there wasn't any pressure to make it "good"? idk!! it's very weird.

then i wrote and posted my first complete fic. just a oneshot, nothing special, and i was like. UNREASONABLY nervous about posting it. like. i am a confident person, okay? i was going to make a burner AO3 account and post it under a different name so nobody would know it was me, and then never mention it to anyone except MAYBE super close friends. i got talked out of doing that (thanks i feel a bit silly about considering that now). and then i received my first comment on it, which was basically a two-liner where someone said they liked it and thanked me for writing it.

and i was like. ??...?????? ???????? ...??!!! because i felt like... uncontainable glee? i was freakishly happy. the amount of serotonin those two sentences gave me was definitely unnatural.

is that healthy? idk. will it continue? idk. LOL. i hope so? but idk, some people said it wears off if you write/post for a while. but whatever, the fact that one little comment like that could make my entire day blew my mind. tbh i thought writers were just exaggerating when they said stuff like that.

ever since then i started leaving comments! that shit's easy! like what was i overthinking for? i'm such a fucking tryhard! all i gotta say is that i liked it, and even the bare minimum can bring lots of joy to someone.

so basically what im trying to say is that negative reinforcement doesn't do shit!! it just makes people feel bad about themselves. that post is nasty for guilt-tripping readers like that, and i bet you it's going to have the opposite effect (or no effect tbh).

YAPPING FINISHED. for now.

[copperbadge]

[ID: Four images; top left is a bright white light mounted on the ceiling of a shower, and the top middle is the remote control for it, mounted sideways on a wall. The top right is an overhead light in my front hallway, which is an unusual shade of green. Bottom image shows a window in the corner of my living room, with a star-shaped lamp hanging in the middle of it, gently glowing with light.]

Ironically, this is all photography of the stuff I didn't intend to do today.

I've been considering getting an offsite storage unit (more on this in another post) and it turns out some good friends who live nearby were also, but neither of us need a TON of space, so we decided to go in halves on the unit. They're a little more prepared than I am to move in, but they also have a car and will help me move my stuff when they move theirs, so for the next week or until the project is done, I'm mostly going to be packing big plastic bins with stuff I'm taking to storage. And all the bins I currently own have my full name on them in big block letters, so I won't be photographing those.

A side-effect of this, however, is that in the "DIY" bin (which will not be going to storage but needed weeding) I uncovered a light bulb that fits my star light, which had been flickering due to a dying bulb. So I got out Darth Ladder and changed the bulb. I figured as long as the ladder was out, I'd replace the bathroom lamp with a remote-control version, and that's a whole comedy of errors, but suffice it to say this one, which has a remote and doesn't NEED good motion sensing, actually has great motion sensing. So while I hung the remote on a magnetic bracket nearby, I probably won't need to use it much. I had to hang it sideways to get it to work, so now it does kind of look like my toilet has a control panel.

I found one other lightbulb in the DIY bin, a Kasa smart bulb -- I bought one for my bedroom floor lamp so I could turn the light on without getting out of bed, but they come in packs of two and I'd just kind of stashed the other one to deal with later, then forgot about it. As long as I was already running around risking death on Darth Ladder, I thought I'd install one in my hall lamp. I have two hall lamps on one switch, but I like to leave the front-door lamp on when I go out so that I don't come back to a totally dark hallway. This way, I can turn the smart lamp (nearer the living room) off so I don't have two unnecessary lights burning.

Also as you can see, it has some rad color settings, so if I want to have a little hallway rave, I can.

I sometimes find listening to new podcasts kind of challenging, so today I had some comfort-listening: The "Art Nouveau" and "De Havilland Comet" episodes of Well There's Your Problem. The Art Nouveau episode is a "bonus episode" you get with a Patreon membership and that episode alone is worth the $2 a month.

[sturnioloszn]

TRICK OR TREAT? - C.S

summary; your friend drags you to the sturniolo's annual halloween party but your slutty costume catches chris' eye and staring isn't enough.

warnings; smut, oral, praise, begging, dirty talk, mentions of alcohol.

a/n; this is my first post, so let's keep the hate tame, thank you. but if you enjoyed this, feel free to leave suggestions on other stuff I can write or if you want to see different content (texts, clips, etc) because I suck ass at writing lmaoo.

★ ° . *　　°　.　°☆ 　. * ● ¸. 　　　★ 　° :. ★　 * •

"Y/n come onnnn, are you really going to make me go by myself AGAIN?" My friend complains as she flops down on her bed in front of me.

"You know parties aren't my scene, especially not the Sturniolo's parties," I say, leaning against the headboard. Every year on Halloween, the Sturniolo's throw a massive party at their house and it always details a shit ton of alcohol and drugs.

"It'll be funnn, just give it a chance, you haven't come to a party with me since high school," She continues to whine about the fact that she always has to go alone or find random people to hang with but it's not my fault we are polar opposites.

She continues her persuasion for another half hour and I finally begin to cave.

"Even if I were to go, I don't have a costume to wear," I say, shrugging my shoulders, knowing that she'll find something so that I'm forced to go.

"You can just wear what I wore last year, you'd look so hot," She replies as she moves towards her closet. She's rummaging through her clothes, pulling out random pieces of clothing and tossing them over her shoulder, causing them to scatter all over the room, making a mess.

"How slutty is it?" I laugh, acknowledging the fact that she loves going out half naked every Halloween since we were 16.

"Actually, not bad at all," She says, pulling out a leather mini skirt and a low-cut body con top. I look at the clothes layed out on the bed with a clear sense of confusion.

"What is this supposed to be?" I say trying to make sense of the plain, black clothes.

"A black cat, duh," She grins.

"Are you serious?" I ask, furrowing my brows to see if she's joking or not.

"Of course, it doesn't look like much now, but with a few accessories and makeup, it'll look amazing. You're just going to have to trust me,"

Ugh, I guess I'm going to this party.

~

I'm sliding into the tight-fitting clothes that I was given, and I could barely breathe. The skirt just about covers my ass and any movement at all would cause my ass to be on show completely. Whereas the top pushed my tits together, making it the focal point of the outift. Wow. I looked like a slut.

I paired the outfit with black mid-thigh tights, black platform heels, and gloves with claws attached at the fingertips. I went to show my friend who was currently doing her own makeup.

"What do you think?" I ask, already certain of her response.

"Oh. My. God." She says, turning around in her makeup chair to look at me properly. "If you weren't my bestfriend...smash," She speaks again, now giggling.

I laugh at her stupid commentary before questioning what to do for my makeup. She insists on doing it, so I wait for her to finish her makeup before doing mine.

Our costumes didn't really correlate considering I was a black cat and she was a slutty Wednesday Addams but regardless we did look hot.

After a few hours of getting ready, we were finally heading towards the door. We took an uber to the triplets house even though I would probably be able to drive anyway because I had no intention of drinking.

As the car pulled into the neighbourhood, you could instantly identify which house the party was being held at. Aside from the heaps of cars messily parked around, there were a bunch of people gathered outside, in front of the house, with red solo cups in their hands and music blaring from inside the house.

We stepped out of the uber and began to make our way to the door. I felt at least 4 pairs of eyes on my ass, I knew this skirt was going to be a problem. The party itself consisted of a bunch of sweaty and drunk strangers rubbing against each other.

I will never understand parties.

Before we got too close to the speaker, I felt someone move to my ear. "I'm gonna go get something to drink, what do you want?" My friend asked.

"Nothing, I'm not drinking," I say, also speaking into her ear since the music is already too loud.

"Oh, come on, you need to loosen up, it'll make the party more tolerable," She says as if she acknowledges the fact that being at a party sober really does kill the atmosphere.

"Fine, just get me something that's not too strong," I give in. I guess I am drinking tonight. Good thing we took an uber then.

After a few drinks and a couple of shots, I feel my walls come down, and I began to actually enjoy myself. I lost sight of my friend a while ago, but I know she's either dancing or getting laid. Either way, I'm happy for her.

As I'm dancing and swerving my hips to the beat of the music, I feel a pair of eyes burn into the back of my head. I turn around and see Chris leaning on the kitchen counter with a red solo cup in his hand. We make eye contact for a brief moment before I decide to turn back around and keep dancing as if his glare wasn't intimidating the fuck out of me.

A few moments go by, and as I rock my hips, I feel a presence come up behind me, and 2 firm hands grip either side of my hips. I shift my head to the side to see who it could be, and of course, it was him. However, turning my head seemed to be a mistake because it gave Chris the opportunity to dip his head onto my shoulder. This makes my heartbeat instantly spike.

I then feel his lips move to my ear, "You've been driving me insane for 2 hours straight,".

The atmosphere becomes thick, and I'm struggling to find the air to breathe. "What are you talking about?" I ask innocently, putting up a façade.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about, don't act naive," he responds. I guess he's smarter than he looks. Before I have the chance to say anything else, I feel him speak into my ear again, "Trick or treat?".

What? What is he talking about?

"Treat?" I respond not really knowing what I'm asking for. I feel his smirk grow against my ear before he intertwines his fingers with mine and begins to drag me down the stairs of his house. We walk down a narrow hallway, and we reach a room. He puts a code in to open it and pulls me into the room with him.

I look around briefly and realise it's likely his bedroom. It looks like a normal guy's room; a king-size bed, a desk with a gaming setup, a closet, you know, the usual pieces found in a bedroom.

I turn to look at him, and he's looking straight at me as if he's trying to memorise my face.

"So, do you want your treat now?" He questions seductively as he steps towards me. I consequently take a step back, but I'm blocked from making any further moves when my back hits the door. I gulp at the fact that there's nowhere for me to run or hide.

"What's my treat?" I ask, my voice being barely louder than a whisper. His eyes are glued to mine, and it begins to feel a bit like a staring competition.

"Whatever you want," He smirks.

"Whatever I want?" I repeat slightly in shock, my heartbeat growing faster and faster. On top of my heart trying to escape from my chest, I feel my wetness beginning to gather in my panties. I mean, who could blame me. I was being seduced by The Chris Sturniolo himself.

He nods at my silly repetition.

All of a sudden, I feel a wave of confidence wash over me. This must be the alcohol resurfacing.

"I want your mouth between my legs," I say, looking at his face for a response to what I just said. A sly grin crawls up his face as his hand slides up to the side of my face and holds me gently as he guides my head towards his.

I feel his soft lips come in contact with mine, and I feel myself melt into his touch. The kiss was soft and tender, but it very easily transformed into one full of lust and passion. The hand that was cupping my cheek moves to the nape of neck, and his other hands begins to roam across my hip and lower back.

I take the chance to slip off my gloves and tangle my hands into his messy hair. Chris grows tired of kissing my lips and firmly tilts my head upwards to give him access to my neck. He delivers wet, open-mouthed kisses all over my neck and collar bone before I feel him find my sweet spot. I release a soft moan at his discovery, which just encourages him to suck and stimulate that area further.

As he continues to mark my neck, I feel his hands move to the back of my thighs before delivering a few taps. I obediently listen to his commands as he lifts me up from the floor, and I wrap my legs around his torso. In this new position, I feel his hard dick strain against clothed pussy.

Suddenly, my back is pulled away from the door, and I feel him carry me towards the bed. Surely, a few seconds later, I was placed onto his mattress. He was on top of me, still placing kisses all over me but slowly making his way closer to my tits.

Before his mouth even has the chance to reach my tits he pulls away. I shudder a little at the loss of contact, but my disappointment doesn't last long when I realise he has his eyes on the prize. He shifts down the bed so that he's now lying on his stomach, and I feel his breath on my inner thighs.

He places a gentle kiss along the inside of my thighs, and I buck my hips at his face, needing his lips somewhere else.

"You're so impatient, aren't you?" He sneers against my soft skin. I groan at his question because he knows where I want him, and yet he's everywhere, but where I need him most.

"Please, Chris, I need you..so, so bad," I plead, I don't care how needy I sound. I just need the relief. With every kiss he placed on my skin, the wetter I became, and it started to become unbearable.

He hummed at my pathetic begging, which caused jolts of electricity to spark all around my body. He finally gave in, and he pulled my panties to the side, taking in the sight before him.

My wet, pink pussy was displayed right infront of him and all he could do was smile. He carefully brought his middle finger to my slick folds, and he collected the wetness that had gathered, I moaned at this action, finally getting some relief. He then brought his finger to his lips and sucked it clean.

He held eye contact with me the entire time, and the only thing I could do was look into his lifeless, blue eyes as he pleased me. He finally sunk his middle finger into me, and the relief was intense. His long, slender finger pumped in and out rhythmically.

"You're so fucking wet, and I've barely touched you," He states almost disgusted by me. His comment made me throw my head back and just focus on his delicious movements. After a few moments, he added his ring finger to the mix, stretching me out further.

All of this was nothing, though. The second he lowered his mouth, I knew I didn't stand a chance. His tongue begins to expertly lick between my folds, collecting all of my juices. By now, I'm a breathy and whimpering mess.

"Chris, please," I plead again.

"What do you want, baby?" He asks, briefly pulling away.

"I want to come on your tongue," I breathe out.

This encourages him to work more efficiently, as he moves his mouth over my bundle of nerves before sucking at it. I can't help but moan at how good it feels.

His fingers are still pumping in and out of me at an amazing pace, and his mouth is working wonders. I feel my orgasm building up in my stomach. I tangle one of my hands into his hair to push him into me further. I need him as close as to me as possible.

At this point, I'm practically riding his face, but I can't help it from how good it feels. My legs begin to spam uncontrollably, and I know I was close.

"I'm so...~ah~...close" I moan, letting him know even though he can definitely tell.

"Beg to come," He says without slowing his movements.

"Please let me come...it feels so good, please...I'm begging you, Chris," I beg shamelessly. He's satisfied with my pitiful pleads and starts to move both his tongue and fingers faster. All that can be heard is the music from the party bleeding into the room and the wet sound of him pleasuring me. This pushes me even closer to the edge.

I feel my orgasm about to wash over me, and I know he knows because I feel my pussy squeeze around his fingers and my thighs grip his head, basically holding him in place.

"You're doing so good f'me," He manages to say while drowing in me, and that was the final straw.

I finally let go, and I feel my juices cover his mouth, chin, and fingers as he continues to ride out my high. I arch my back off the bed, and the most pornographic moans leave my mouth.

I start to recover, and his movements begin to slow. He eventually separates his mouth from my pussy and he slips his fingers out. He moves his body back up to my face, and he places soft kisses against my mouth, and I taste myself on his tongue.

"That was..." I begin to say but realise I can't find words powerful enough to describe how amazing that was. He just smiles lazily at me.

He then moves to lay beside me on the bed, I'm still catching my breath as I hear him wince. I look over and see him looking down. I follow his gaze over to where his dick is basically fighting it's way out of his jeans. He's rock hard. I bet it hurts.

I look over at him once again and smirk before moving off the bed and bringing myself to the floor between his legs...

★ ° . *　　°　.　°☆ 　. * ● ¸. 　　　★ 　° :. ★　 * •

a/n; should I do a p2 to this??? let me know, and I'll do it, I'm also taking requests, it doesn't have to be smut. I'm happy to write cute one shots or fluffs with Matt, Chris, or Nick. anyway, thank you for readingg, love you <33.

[heretherebedork]

I understand your feelings about the narrative stuff going on with Jack vs. Joke, but I just read a post from @poetry-protest-pornography commenting on the same issue ("Jack was always going to forgive Joke." is in bold on top, can't link to it in an ask) and I rather agree with their take on it- Jack habitually lashes out yet comes around later. Also, did you see Petty's theory that J&J is actually a sneaky retelling of "Journey to the West"? A ton of stuff makes way more sense in that light :)

I did see both of those posts and my honest answer doesn't change.

Because, yes, sure, there was always going to be reconciliation. I never really doubted that.

But the narrative that Joke's trauma doesn't matter is still going to bother me. Yes, Jack is going to forgive Joke and would have tried to find him again regardless.

But that doesn't change that the show is specifically downplaying Joke's habit of self-blame, including basically turning it into a joke with Grandma telling him he's made too many mistakes and to forgive himself.

Because his inability to forgive himself is never taken seriously by the narrative. The show takes his pain seriously at times but it's always because he was wrong and deserves pain and not because he blames himself for things that couldn't possibly be just his fault.

The show lets Jack forgive Save with a single apology and then has them plan a heist together instantly while Joke is entirely absent from the narrative for an extended period of time.

What was Jack's plan if Joke hadn't been kidnapped by Boss? How was he going to forgive him after Joke did everything he could to follow the last thing Jack had said?

And now the set up with the game leaves us with no room for the emotional reconciliation because we've got a hangman game going with bombs and that leaves very little room for deep emotional intricacies and for us to see Jack realize that Joke is also struggling with things besides being murdered.

How many quiet moments will we get in the next episode?

I mean, frankly, my criticism of the narrative goes beyond that and starts to go into 'why wasn't Save a bigger part of the show if he was going to be so important at the end' but if we get into that... let's just not.

Anyway, I do see both their points but I also think that the flaws with the narrative and this specific aspect of the narrative go much deeper than that.

Honestly, despite everything, I was so deeply hoping for a quiet resolution to their issues, for an actual conversation, for something where we got to see that Jack saw Joke's issues and could try to work on his own lashing out so he could push Joke to grow as well.

But nope.

I wanted Jack to have to chase after Joke because he left because of what Jack said. I wanted the emotional reunion to be about them. But now Jack is racing to save Joke's life and of course he's going to call him his boyfriend but it's going to utterly remove so much of the depth of Joke's possible responses and conversations and I am just... whatever. Whatever.

It's not a bad show. I'm enjoying parts of it.

But 'Jack planned on forgiving Joke regardless' is not the aspect of the narrative I have the most issue with.

[just-orbiting-you]

I actually agree quite a bit with the other anon regarding TH/JK hyung/dongsaeng relationship. You say they don't have that stereotypical relationship, but I think that's more because JK is more emotionally mature that TH, which I think is also part of the reason they grew distant. I think TH does want that kind of relationship with JK, but he oversteps JK's boundaries into an almost coddling/condescending territory (think him squeezing JK's cheeks in that one twt video after BB #1 or him making this almost grossly cutesy caption for the recent photos) which I think pushes JK away. I think JK has always been kind sensitive to boundaries, but I think as he's gotten older, he's gotten even more strict about setting boundaries (which includes with fans based on stuff he said during his livestreams).

I think TH's personality naturally does not always respect boundaries, but with JK, I think he can push it further because of him being the hyung, so he does. But as we know, JK doesn't want to be "cute", he wants to be acknowledged as having matured and I think sometimes the way TH treats him disrespects that, him probably feeling more mature than TH probably exacerbates that feeling too (plus being in a group without a strict age hierarchy that never forced him into a maknae role). I don't know about posting, but a lot of the babying or disrespecting boundaries stuff TH does to JK, he would never be allowed to do towards the older members. They give him grace because they obviously love him, but there are limits.

I do think TH feels some jealousy towards jikook, but its not about fame , attention, or fan engagement, but about their genuine closeness and feeling left out. I don't think TH feels close to hyung line much beyond them being like older brothers (compare to like JM who gets along with all of them and has JH especially close, or JK who also get along with most of them, but also is very close to jin). Over the years, the maknae line dynamic shifted a ton, with TH ending up kind of the outsider, and with JK specifically pulling away from him (IMO for the reasons I mentioned above). Now JM and JK enlisted together and have a travel show coming out, and I do think he probably feels pretty left out. To me, if he did post those photos for a negative reason, it wasn't about shippers or attention, but feeling left out and maybe a little petty. He probably also feels a little defensive of his relationship with JK, not so much to fans, but even internally. Weirdly, although they hung out more in 2023, I don't know if I can tell they actually bonded or got closer? Like JK leaving the movie premier to go live on his own or them going on trips, but with other people and to do specific activities. I understand why jkkers think they hung out more because JM was busy, because tbh, that's kind of the way it looks. And I mean that outside of any shipping discourse, I think JK's preferred person to hand with in bts is JM most of the time (base don the things he says and how much time we hear about them spending together behind the scenes). Maybe we'll see some strongly renewed bond between TH and JK after military service, but I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't. And I wouldn't be surprised if TH felt a little insecure about that, like he wanted or tried to reconnect with JK and I'm sure they had fun, but it didn't go any deeper. I'm not saying they don't care about each other, but I do think their personalities kind of inhibit the sort of closeness some of the other members have.

i'm being so real when i say anon you hit it right on the nose. i've been trying to form my own thoughts on this and i really love hearing other opinions on tae in relation to jikook.

JK is more emotionally mature that TH, which I think is also part of the reason they grew distant. I think TH does want that kind of relationship with JK, but he oversteps JK's boundaries into an almost coddling/condescending territory (think him squeezing JK's cheeks in that one twt video after BB #1 or him making this almost grossly cutesy caption for the recent photos) which I think pushes JK away.

this perfectly encapsulates how i feel about tae in that he always takes it a step too far and doesn't have the awareness to understand why that is. i think you clarified a point from the first anon about if tae were to post disrespecting boundaries of other members, it wouldn't go over well. it just doesn't sit well that tae gets a hyung card pass to kind of post about jungkook in the way he does. of course its kinda harmless and i don't think jungkook will do anything about it, but to me its clear he doesn't feed into the relationship like tae does.

my mind goes straight to the conversation they had in the first in the soop (where jimin had to go fetch jk for tae), and jungkook spoke about how him and tae drifted apart. but also that tae pushed for jungkook to drop honorfics and jungkook was very strict in that he does not want to. tae is always looking to push the envelope further.

also i think its funny that tae posts like he does about jungkook, but jungkook doesn't even have instagram anymore to actually interact with the posts. i have no clue if tae lets jungkook vet the posts before he posts them. from what we can understand, it is tae crafting the narrative around current t@ekook, not jungkook. and that enables tae's power over jungkook's wishes even further.

I do think TH feels some jealousy towards jikook, but its not about fame , attention, or fan engagement, but about their genuine closeness and feeling left out.

i've sensed this for a long time and it goes back to old 2019 lives where tae asks jimin to join him, but jimin says he's with jungkook so he can't. it just always feels like he wants in on jimin and jungkook, separately and together, but often is fresh out of luck. i think the telltale sign that tae and jungkook's relationship did not go any deeper last year was 1. jungkook never talked about him and 2. it was always with a group of friends.

plus from other asks too and what you said, i don't think tae has strong relationships with the hyung line, expect for hobi (but even hobi seems closer to jikook). so his only tie to bts is clinging to this newfound relationship he is trying to build with jungkook by pushing for him to join his friend group, and broadcasting it to the whole world.

thank you for putting so much attention into this ask anon, because the emotional difference between tae and jk really wasn't illuminated for me until now. jungkook i think has progressed past tae's immaturity, making him a better match for someone like jimin anyway.

[whoslaurapalmer]

twin peaks but it happens in 2010. laura palmer have iphone etc etc

this ask has been haunting me since i saw it last night oh my god okay okay so

i wanted to lead with laura being an influencer but no one was quite influencing in 2010 yet. but the point here being that i think she posts a lot online and cultivates her online image very carefully (very soft, carefree, excited teenager) and has a LOT of followers on everything and always gets a ton of likes. bc it's laura, she's so beautiful and special and popular, of course everyone is following her, of course everyone is liking all her posts to get a piece of her

she has a twitter (laurapalmer93) where she posts a lot of pictures with little captions like.......'morning donuts at the diner!!' with a picture of the donuts and a milkshake or a Coffee To Be An Adult, 'can you believe this guy? <3' with a picture of bobby making a face (or even.........dare i say it...........doing the dougie), a picture of donna and james with '<33333333' (modern emojis were just getting really big then but i myself was not a big emoji user in 2010 yet, so neither is laura), 'don't tell ;)' with a picture of her holding a cigarette (of course everyone still smokes in the high school bathrooms).

one time she gets away with posting the lyrics to if i die young by the band perry (IF I DIE YOUNG! BURY ME IN SATIN! LAY ME DOWN ON A BED OF ROSES!) (FUNNY WHEN YOU'RE DEAD HOW PEOPLE START LISTENING!) bc it's a popular song. it raises a few eyebrows but it's a song and it's laura. how seriously do you take teen angst, even among your friends? that's just what laura does. what's there to really worry about, huh? (the song was released in may 2010 but let's say the lead up to her death is in 2010)

on facebook she posts a lot of volunteer stuff. school dance photos, which she helps organize. buy some cookies to support the french club!! she's very involved with student council, and she organizes the group halloween costume. her facebook is filled with photos of her with other people, but not really any of just her. she doesn't post a lot of statuses, but they're usually about homework or tests or 'feels like summer!' towards the end of the school year. she's friends with her parents. she definitely takes ap classes.

she has a private vent twitter (lostinthewoods) with zero followers that she uses as a diary bc she thinks it'll be safer than having it physically written down. her childhood lisa frank diary with the tiny lock and glitter gel pens that she kept in her bed post went missing, after all. her vent twitter is filled with sooooooo many tweets bc this was still the 160 character limit days and she would just post and post and post especially late at night. (she definitely has string lights in her room.) she is a MASTER of using her phone with no one seeing -- she has the layout absolutely memorized. she was only caught texting in class once and of course the teacher let it go.

bob/leland finds her passwords and breaks into the vent twitter and leaves her horrifying tweets she sees later, instead of the back and forth they have in the diary and leland ripping the pages out.

i think she has a third twitter, for sex, but i'm not sure if that tracks for the time period? (snapchat wasn't a thing until fall 2011.) or like a forum sort of thing? i think it's still super easy for laura to sneak out, even in an increased security camera world. there's still a lot of stress on the, yknow, ~secret unexposed underbelly of the world especially in a time of more eyes on everything~ in the 2010s.

meanwhile, james posts music a lot on facebook, and also acoustic covers of songs. like. yknow. HEY SOUL SISTER. donna loves the original pusheen stickers. they record the picnic video on her flip video camera. mike loves icanhascheezburger, and he jailbreaks his phone. audrey gets really into audrey hepburn quote posting, Aesthetic France, black and white photos, berets, has a photography phase and carries and actual camera bc it's Vintage. she's an early tumblr user. no one else in school has a tumblr yet, so she feels very cool but also very lonely about it.

harry has very little understanding of social media, however cooper is very into all social media, he finds it delightful. he enjoys a good cat video. he looks through all of laura's photos, her tweets, facebook videos, and i think there's, honestly even more of a feeling of tragedy bc of how much more physical evidence there is available of laura's life, lingering fingerprints, last tweets, last posts, passwords to put in and information to see, cold blue computer light, the even worse voyeurism in people expecting so much of your life to be online, in watching it play out online, in the image laura created for herself online to be the person people expected

donna rereads laura's twitter in the dead of night, just over and over again. goes back through their texts. so much of grief has become so much more public with social media and using it as a teenager, and there's this back and forth in donna of not posting anything and then posting the most miserable statuses about losing her best friend.

i know i should get deeper into the investigation but i keep thinking instead of how laura definitely gets a 20/20 special. it's probably definitely called 'the secret life of the american teenager.' (bc there was that show on at the time with the same name) elizabeth vargas visits twin peaks, is appropriately grim, there's a lot of b roll of the town and the woods but without the grace of twin peaks' cinematography. they play up the creation of a narrative big, as they always do on 20/20. the revelation of her 'double life' is at the halfway mark and simultaneously not discussed enough and overestimated. 'laura palmer was your average, everyday teenager -- she liked horses. cats. she got good grades, was homecoming queen, had a boyfriend on the football team. she volunteered on weekends. she had her whole life ahead of her. or was there more to the story than anyone knew? was there a dark side to the all-american girl?' oh, it's agonizing. the trailers play up a lot of potential spooky woods stuff that isn't followed through on in the actual episode.

now 20/20 prides itself on getting the story right, so i feel like it's.........i feel like they have to say it's leland at the end (and they definitely never get into anything about bob). but i also think, for some reason, it could easily have a 'we never found the killer' ending. especially re: s3........the thing is, i feel like laura's death particularly is the kind of thing that shows up on 20/20, but the rest of the circumstances would've ended up on like the unsolved mysteries website (the last revival ended in 2010, before the netflix reboot in 2019) (especially with WELL OUR FBI AGENT WENT MISSING). and there's so much online to put together in a website about it, there's so much for people online to dig into who have never even been to twin peaks, to think they know a town and the people in it and the girl who died even if it's just literally THE MOST DISGUSTING VOYEURISM IN THE WHOLE WORLD i just think there's such a. horror in that. people have the most, just, enraging takes when they get involved in a Murder That Happened Somewhere Else. people thinking they alone can figure out a mystery they've never seen, they can of course see something no one else has. and it's different than the people in the town ignoring it -- i think a lot of the secrets in twin peaks stay the same, no matter the time period, so of course it's still, a terrible dying town killing the people in it, maybe even quieter than it is in the original, some new infrastructure but old buildings, not all of them occupied anymore, ANYWAY -- like of course yes people in the town ignore the same amount they did in the original, all small towns bury things. but just bc the town itself isn't paying attention doesn't mean that some rando online is going to know more, no matter how much they think they will. there's like an entitlement to details of a murder, an I Must Be The Hero, The Savior, bc i'm on a fucking reddit thread about it

now i have zero (0) idea of how medical science and forensics work, but i have to assume there have been some advancements in the field between 1989/1990 and 2010/2011. the town still rushes the funeral, but would albert have been able to find anything else sooner? what is it he would have found to point to leland sooner? oh........dna testing, maybe? would he be able to find out about leland right away? there's more of a sense of urgency, maybe less of a slowness between events, even more of a shattering horror. maybe leland goes missing in an attempt to cover things up. hmmmmmm.

final note -- cooper gets called mulder as a nickname bc the x files happened as a show in this universe.

[windvexer]

find some stuff to do magic about (feat. practicing sorcery is fun and good)

Do you want to do magic? Yes. Do you know what to do magic on? Maybe not. Here is a post for that. Take what you like and leave the rest behind.

Confront your learned helplessness face on because I'll bet money that there's a shit ton of stuff in your life you'd change if you hadn't trained yourself to pave it over just to make your highway of life a little less bumpy.

Let me tell you something I believe. I believe that most all of us have been trained to think that:

wanting things to go well,

wanting to be happy,

wanting little joys and pleasures in life,

and wanting not to be aggravated by the small things

somehow makes us weak, lacking, immature, or insecure,

or even worse,

that putting up with bullshit is somehow automatically makes us a better person, as if we've all got a cosmic thermometer that won't ding "good person!" until we've had it up to here with bullshit and then still force ourselves to grin and bear it.

"If I do magic to shorten the Starbucks drive-through doesn't that make me impatient? I don't want to use magic as spiritual bypassing in order to avoid my flaws."

Well then. Far be it from me to decry the kratophany of Prometheus getting his liver pecked out by eagles every day, manifest in your sacred sacrifice of having your minutes pecked out of your day, one by one, as you wait in line.

Make a list. Keep it with you. On paper, on your phone. Doesn't matter. It's a list of things you'd like to change. Little fleeting things that rear their head only for a second or so before our industrial-powered steamrollers smash it into the ground. Big things that you stew over day to day.

No problem is too petty. No splinter in your side is too insignificant. Betty at the office blows her nose every day at 8:15am and if you have to hear it one more time you are going to burn the building down? Put it on the list.

Do you have to leave 20 minutes early for work on Thursdays because a freight train blocks the freeway for five minutes and your city backs up like Betty's nose? What is magic going to do, rearrange the city's entire traffic patterns? Maybe so. Who cares. That's magic's problem, not yours. Put it on the list.

Have your eye on quite a cute designer bag? Does it cost your monthly rent? Put it on the list.

Learn to stare your life in the eye again with the verv of someone who has just found a reality-warping gun with unlimited ammunition. Game night gets cancelled too often? You never remember to use your pizza coupons? You can never remember to get ginger ale at the store? Put it on the list.

Feed yourself what ails you like a crab going absolutely bonkers in a plankton-filled tank.

just do some of that normal "witchy" stuff, why not

Protections: Not only for spirits and stuff!

Against unwanted solicitors

Against your room mate's creepy partner coming over

Against debt collectors finding your new phone number

Against surprise quizzes in your course

Against nightmares

And from time to time a sorcerer does like a good house ward. Experiment with yours, why not? Waiting until you're under attack to learn how to put up protections is like waiting until you're drowning to learn swimming. Sure, the sheer adrenaline-fueled terror might get you somewhere - or it might get in the way.

You don't normally use altars? Build one, why not. Build secret ones in shoe boxes. Experiment with altars and compound magic.

Perhaps you'd like a mini spellcasting kit to go? I don't know if making one counts as doing magic, but it's fun to make them.

Why not develop and prepare an oil or incense blend that must steep for a few months before it's ready? You don't need it now, right? So that means it's prime time to make things that are supposed to "mature" before use.

And hey, what's the deal with cleansing? A lot of people make fun of it now. Some people say it's important and necessary. Why not get really into cleansing and develop your own take? Practice gentle cleansing, nuclear cleansing, cleansing with pure energy and cleansing with candles, cleansing with cleaning products and cleansing with joy.

casting a spell right now is not the same thing as activating it right now and you can still gain a lot of experience in magic without releasing spells into the wild

I think that a lot of people think of spells as I light the candle and the spell is activated and it goes and does the thing, so if there is no Thing right now, then I can't cast the spell,

whereas if you reframed it as I am creating a spell-creachur that will hibernate in this little vessel until I spill it out into the world,

you may actually find that there are dozens of spells for you to actively develop, experiment with, cast, learn from, and passively benefit from - without necessarily needing any of them right now.

And the benefit is, if you don't actually need it right now, that takes a ton of pressure off of you. If you're not acting out of desperation, experimentation can be very fun indeed.

What about the most intense jaw-breakingly stupid strong protective amulet you've ever conceived of? Make it, why not. Make five prototypes on your journey to the strongest danged protection amulet this side of social media.

Who cares if you don't need them? Maybe some day you'll meet someone who does. Or, you know, magic is fun and doing it is its own reward.

What about a talisman for dreamwork and astral travel? Make something that reeks so intensely of the moon that it launches people out of their bodies just by walking past it.

Decide to perfect the most dazzling money-drawing candle spell. Make that your thing. You don't need cash right now? No worries; donate it to charity.

Have fun. Experiment. Made something that came through a little too hard and now it's causing problems? What a wonderful opportunity to learn how to disassemble a spell vessel.

Make yourself a cabinet full of enchantments. Learn how to contain the energy radiating off of all those enchantments. Realize you need more space and learn to combine multiple similar enchantments into one vessel.

make trusting friends who will let you cast on them.

(self explanatory)

[jamiekb]

Exploring the new Welcome Home Update

So here's my journey through the new update and the little details that it has, this will be a very long post and of course full of spoilers.

Look at the new design for the loading screen, so Christmas-y! I particularly love the antlers on Home's chimney.

Looking good Wally! And now we have new little doodles that seem to go with the holiday.

Ok so according to the admins no more bugs so wonder what will be different this time. Onto the news page then

Also I'm really digging the new background

Ok starting the FAQ now and some questions and answers are interesting. So they've been receiving more material covered in goop. They kinda adress in universe the move of the website, due to malicious material and in the code of the page.

And there is one new hidden message in the answers (I think) "The numbers are so hard to read. Sometimes I can't see them" So do we have to look for numbers now?

Took a detour through the stickers and they have new ones! There is Wally making a Home out of snow, sleeping Julie, I think Frank singing Carols to a butterfly, Poppy with a Jello thing, Eddie with a ton of presents to deliver, Howdy with some relatives, Sally as the star of a Christmas tree and Barnaby with a snowman.

Also with the "Welcome Home" banners two are a bit more desaturated now. And now that I think about it there are some stains in the main banner too

Neighborhood

Anyway unto the Neighborhood! Looks so cute although I'll be honest the clock tower is a bit weird and the trees feel a bit more intense at the edges or maybe that's just me

Eddie seems quite normal though now apparantly he has a mother, I'm confident that didn't use to be there. Is it weird that other than Wally hes the only one that didn't add anything new to his home for the season?

I think Howdy's description also changed a bit but nothing alarming. His store now seems to have signs welcoming his family for the holidays.

Checking Barnaby's description they seem to all have a bit more background info, since he apparently left his farm life to come to Home. Ok what does "Barnaby’s middle initial was often rotated in terms of what it stood for" mean???

Poppy is so cute! Is she holding cupcakes decorated like the characters or did she already do that? Ok but her new details feel very interesting: she claims to be able to fly but it's never shown and she never leaves her house to the point of being excluded from some events (like Wally's Homewarming party I guess)

Sallys is fine. She's besties with Poppy I guess and she can shine??? How do you make a puppet shine?? Were they roommates maybe?

Oh Julie got quite a backstory. Named siblings, she has paws and used to live in the forest on the outskirts of Home in a cave with her family. And she hibernates that's too cute!

Great my dear Frank still gets no background info (which is very interesting) but he goes get forced heteronormativity.

Ok and Wally is kinda similar, no background info just very dedicated to Home. And I''l see about coming back to the As above so below page since I can't seem to click it, might just be me. You can still see the goop at the doorstep though

Merchandise

Ok so first off the Merchandise page has a different background to the rest, some colorful static and took a bit to load.

oooh they even changed the layout for the phone since you could hear Wallys call, that's such a cool detail

Maybe I'll go back and see if Eddies or Sally's stories have been changed in the audio or transcipt but I'll stick to the new stuff for now. Now that i think about maybe Sally's doesn't have the bit where the transcript couldnt understand it.

Finally reached the wish book and I love it so much, this is so much work all around! My favorites are the Frank and Wally pillows, Eddie Dear Lil' Mailman's Kit, the Home Clock and specially the tree skirt! I now have to make those cute neighbors

Oh my god the record has the perfect Santa voice. And.. interesting that the ad cuts off when we get to Eddie. I'm not really surprised thought it would do something when it got to him or Frank, still suspicious.

Homewarming Story

The sound editing for all this new items is amazing!

I love the bit of the characters tripping up the narrators, this one just hasn't been able to get it right.

Hey is it me or in this one they've been a bit more insistent that Frank is a bit too literal but in a not so good way, not that much more intense but can't help but notice it. Seems a bit meaner

The return of Walliford!

Good to know Home uses he/him I guess

excuse me the fuck was that sound distortion???

and then it ends kinda abruptly, so that's that...

Where's my Eddie by the way, they didn't ask him and didn't find him while out on the town. I better hear him at some point or I will riot.

We have a code!

Ok so I was skimming the rest of the material before choosing what to listen to next and saw the cereal and craft at the back! So I guess now I have to find all the little drawings in the page and see when come from that

So I did listen to a few more songs, nice to see Eddie and Frank interacting as always, and noticed that in the transcript pages there are some entries for Mistery Audio, which are actually three of the previously hidden videos so that's interesting

Also not all the pages have four drawings some only one, so I've been trying to keep track which symbols i found where in case it matters. Still don't know what they're for just going around collecting them

Ok nvm I was doing things out of order and now that I got to media can see they are mentioned there

So after finally getting all the little things and going back to tumblr cause honestly I didnt really get what to do, I'm guessing it leads to a website, since one of the pages just has www as the code, so I'll try that I guess since I saw that there is a secret website somewhere. If it takes me too long I'll just look it up

Secret website

Nvm I'm too impatient at this point and I think i was missing a few letters so I just looked it up

Ok so that's interesting, so this person is kinda like the one behind the scenes talking to us along with whatever had infected the website before. They mention how the curator got sick (???) but is better now and that they'll try to update this website with the weird things they find

So the phone is one, like the weird glitched audio from Wally. This audio is interesting cause it plays out technically in real life but Wally speaks as if they are living out their lives...

And then moving on to the commercial they are speaking again of being compelled to know more, to see and wait. I'm sure some is curiosity but that can't be all

ohmygod this is more than 20 minutes long, the effort it must have taken Clown and team is monumental

that little animation is so cute!!!

fast forward many commercials and we have Eddie!!! And even a whole hand helping Poppy or something.

god the tobacco comercial of course they would have one

My poor Eddie boy is so anxious and depressed, why is no one talking to you bud? Like not getting him a present is a thing but not even Julie called him to play... and now is he's spiraling and even mad, that's unusual for sure. Also what's with the perspective of his videos, everything is a commercial or in the case of the secret videos it's interactions with other neighbors. This is more like the secret videos that we're seeing from someones POV, but not even that, we're observing him not looking through his eyes

Oh my poor Eddie is certainly going through it, who let them expose him to The Horrors? The horror aspect of this ARG sure has started to pick up speed, even I picked up some anxiety from that last segment

Also I did notice that Frank eventually dropped the Mr Dear for Eddie when he got more worried, almost like hes more worried than for an act that he has to put up huh?

So that was the newest Welcome home update. I can say it was everything I hoped for and more!!! The team behind it really gave it their all. From VAs for the audios to all the visual and graphic artists for the commercials its all so wonderful

[eponymous-rose]

Monday!

It's been a while since I've done one of these week-in-the-life posts (and I LOVE reading them from others), and it's a particularly stressful week where I'm trying to stay off social media for Reasons, so hey, let's do this again!

It's a busy day, but it starts relatively late - I don't have to leave for the office until 10AM. So, you may ask, why on earth do I set my alarm for 8:30? Is it because I have an elaborate morning routine? Is it so I can hit the gym and go for a jog? No, no, no, it's because I have a little cat who takes the alarm as her cue to cuddle and I don't want to disappoint her, so I inevitably spend half an hour hugging her like a purring teddy bear first thing in the morning before I get up.

I respond to some e-mails as I get ready and on the bus ride over - mostly prep for our department's holiday party (I'm in the band and we're trying to get as much practice in as possible), but also a little work getting supercomputer access restored for an undergrad research assistant, offering to write a letter of recommendation so my colleague doesn't have to (we both know the student well and said colleague is traveling across the country for a funeral on a redeye flight tonight...), reworking some elements of the rubric for the faculty search committee I'm on, and confirming a meeting with my grad student.

10:45 - I get to the office and go to make my usual mug of tea... and realize in the moment I close my office door that the keys are still inside. I get the hot water from the lounge and meander by the office, but nobody's there. Just as I'm about to work up the nerve to go interrupt a more senior professor's meeting to borrow his keys, one of the office staff walks by and is happy to open the door for me, phew.

11:00 - My most senior grad student is doing an internship in Colorado this quarter (it's the location he most wants to do a postdoc at as well!), and we've set up a call to catch up after a few weeks without chatting. It's a bit of an awkward chat because he wants to go to his second conference in two months, and I had to bring out the "well, um, this is a side project you're doing with someone else's research group and you may want to check with them about where the $2000+ for conference costs is coming from". I possibly have an avenue - I might ask him to just attend for a couple of days instead of the whole time, so I can use some funding from a different grant, but I'm hoping we can get some cost-sharing going here, or possibly the other professor he's working with can present his poster for him if need be. Still, his work's going great and I'm hoping we can get him to this conference! He finishes his PhD this year, and I can attest to how helpful conferences are for landing postdocs.

12:00 - Speaking of grants, I had a successful grant come through late last summer to study wildfire smoke dynamics with novel instrumentation (something new to me!), and the whole team is meeting up for the first time to talk logistics! I also have to teach real soon, so I'm only on for the first chunk of the call, but we get some of the plan set up. Looks like we'll be meeting at a NASA facility early next year to do some siting stuff prior to the first controlled burn. I genuinely have no idea what I'm doing on this project, apart from being willing to write a big chunk of the proposal, but it's a good time!

12:30 - Class time! This is my domain-specific intro-to-python class that I developed 5 years ago and have been iterating on ever since. It's going a lot smoother this week than last, and the students are pretty responsive to my jokes (priority #1, lbr) and seem to be following along quite well, judging by the handful of questions I get after class. Not a ton of technical issues today, either, which is a HUGE win over last week.

1:30 - Forecasting time! I'm once again part of our university team in a giant forecasting contest. While I'm decidedly average at it (usually around 250th out of 1000 participants), my grad student was #1 for a while there. We chat in broad terms about the next week of weather in our targeted forecasting region.

2:30 - Meeting with another graduate student! We talk about some of the researchers he reached out to after his first conference a couple weeks ago, and we're starting to narrow down a possible author list for his first paper. He's working on writing up the methods and data for that paper while he incorporates a few new datasets into his preestablished workflow. He's been doing really well! Being a dual-major in CS means his code is a heckuva lot more organized than most second-year grad students I've had.

3:30 - ...nothing??? I've decided to skip my usual seminar and postpone one undergraduate student research meeting this afternoon (the one currently locked out of the supercomputer he needs for his project) since I have a couple of grant proposals due very shortly. I head out to grab some teriyaki to bring back to my office for lunch/dinner, but the restaurant just has a big sign out front saying "closed for FIRE" so I opt to go across the street for some chicken katsu and boba tea instead. I approve the final budget (coming up on a million dollars, no pressure) and keep plugging away at the statement of work (which is basically "what are you going to do, in detail, with one million dollars over the next three years? please tell us in exactly 15 pages, not counting your 3-page bibliography and 6 appendices"). I even find a perfect paper to reference to discuss one of our theories! We've made it through one round of reviews with our pre-proposal, and man, we'd love to do this project - it would be myself, a colleague, and a postdoc looking at some really novel stuff in severe storm predictability over the next three years. I also get a little work done on the invited talk I'm giving to a student journal club tomorrow, and work on some more e-mails (trying to set up a meeting with a friend's graduate student to help her out with some methods she's using from an older paper of mine).

5:15 - One of my colleagues has retired this year and has a farewell song he wants to sing at our holiday party, which happens to be mostly voice & piano, so we agree to meet up before the main practice and go over it a couple times before the rest of the band shows up and he has to head out to dinner. I'm really sorry to see him leaving (although I know he's delighted to get to spend more time with his kids and grandkids) - he and his wife were extremely welcoming when I started here, and were so kind and supportive when Mom died. Just very touched that he reached out to me to play piano on this one. Tragically, though, whoever was supposed to bring in the keyboard hasn't left it in the practice room, so we'll have to wait and run through it with the rest of the band on Thursday. Instead, it's back to the office to get caught up on e-mail and try to slog through more of the grant application (all today's research and work has netted me... 1 page of writing, blah).

6:00 - The rest of the band shows up! We run three songs of our eight-song setlist, and I'm somehow now playing on 4/8 of them, despite there being five people signed up for keys. It's a good time, though!

8:00 - I make it home and give Clara a bunch of new toys that have arrived with her prescription food (one of which she licks for 15 minutes straight). Luckily, tomorrow's work schedule is much more chill!